We hear it almost every session. You sit down and say “yeah I’m doing good this week” and then somewhere around the 20 minute mark your voice changes. Your shoulders drop & the real thing comes out. We notice it immediately, not the words but the shift & we don’t call it out in the beginning on purpose. Because that “I’m good” isn’t you lying to us, It’s you testing the room. Your nervous system is scanning for safety. You’re checking if today feels okay enough to go there. That buffer at the be
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From a therapist’s perspective, this is one of the most powerful moments I witness in the room & it almost never happens when you expect it. We will be talking about something that seems unrelated. A fight with their partner. A reaction they had at work. The way they shut down when someone raises their voice & then they pause. Their eyes shift & they say something like “I just remembered something I have not thought about in years.” And what comes out is usually a moment. Not a dramatic event. N
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